Songs > Miss Fogarty's Christmas Cake

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As I sat in my window last evening
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The letterman brought it to me
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A little gilt-edged invitation sayin'
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"Gilhooly come over to tea"
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I knew that the Fogarties sent it
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So I went just for old friendships sake
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The first thing they gave me to tackle
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Was a slice of Miss Fogarty's cake

   Chorus:
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There were plums and prunes and cherries
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There were citrons and raisins and cinnamon, too
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There was nutmeg, cloves and berries
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And a crust that was nailed on with glue
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There were carraway seeds in abundance
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Such that work up a fine stomach ache
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That could kill a man twice after eating a slice
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of Miss Fogarty's Christmas cake

Miss Mulligan wanted to try it
But really it wasn't no use
For we worked in it over an hour
And we couldn't get none of it loose
Till Murphy came in with a hatchet
And Kelly came in with a saw
That cake was enough be the powers above
For to paralyze any man's jaw

(this verse optional)
Miss Fogarty proud as a peacock
Kept smiling and blinking away
Till she flipped over Flanagan's brogans
And she spilt the homebrew in her tea
Aye Gilhooley she says, you're not eatin'
Try a little bit more for me sake
Ah no, Miss Fogarty says I
For I've had quite enough of your cake

Mulroony was took with the colic
O'Donald's a pain in his head
Mc'Naughton lay down on the sofa
And swore that he wished he was dead
Miss Bailey went into hysterics
And there she did wriggle and shake
And everyone swore they were poisoned
Just from eating Miss Fogarty's cake